Dear Garbage men,
I feel like I owe you a letter of appreciation for the wonderful job you do. Actually I’m writing it on behalf of my three year old son who I’m convinced is your #1 fan. He anticipates your coming every week and no matter how sound asleep he may be, he will always hear the distant rumbling of your garbage truck. I never figured out how it’s possible that he can sometimes sleep through the screaming of his baby brother in the crib next to his bed, but yet not through the faint sound of you wheeling dumpsters into the street, even when it’s a whole block away. It wakes him up every time. Every time. Thank you for that.
Actually, maybe I can understand it, because now it happens to us too. My husband has developed a knee jerk reaction to the sound of your trash dumping. No matter how dead tired he is, it still makes him bolt out of bed like the house is on fire. That’s because we know if CC misses your coming, the day will be off to a bad start. Thank you for doing what no alarm clock has been able to do in this house.
Thank you also for taking time out of your busy work to wave at the little boy sitting atop his daddy’s shoulders looking out the second floor balcony window. Like I said, he’s your #1 fan and that means a lot to him. Videos of you working on youtube is what got him through the sleepless nights when he came down with hand, foot, mouth disease. Do you know that some of those videos have reached a million hits and counting? You all really should consider hiring a publicity agent.
So thank you again from our whole family and keep up the good work. I know it’s a dirty job but someone’s got to do it, right? But if it’s not too much to ask, just once in a while, would it be possible for you not to come at the crack of dawn? The parents of your #1 fan would really appreciate that.